Virtual Console gets “Loaded,” Tosses Some “Yoshi’s Cookie”

Nintendo of America continues their crusade to numb the nerves of all retrogamers everywhere with their two latest releases on the Wii Virtual Console this week, as 96.5% of the population doesn’t care about Super Smash Bros. since the release of Brawl, and Earthbound… well, you’re still young, right? So there’s still a chance it can happen in your lifetime.

So no, nothing quite so spectacular this week. Instead, we’re treated to Yoshi’s Cookie, one of Nintendo’s pseudo-“sequels” to Tetris, in as much as its a puzzle game of the type Nintendo released many of in order to keep the gravy train rolling. This is the NES version, rated E for Everyone, including the 1 or 2 players who may decide to take up controllers and drop 500 Wii Points. 100 stages of aligning like-styled cookies are what await those who lose control of their sweet-tooth.

The other entry this week is another NES title, Bases Loaded, a classic baseball game from a time when “realism” basically meant that the players’ heads weren’t the size of the rest of their bodies. Rated E for Everyone and costing 500 Wii Points, 1 or 2 players can take the mound with 12 teams and 30 players to choose from, and start corking their bats, or eating Mom’s apple pie, or whatever it is that baseball players do. Oh, and you can goad the opposing players into charging the mound. If you have that, what else do you really need?