The Top Video-game Babes of 2009

December 18, 2009

The Top
Video-game Babes of 2009

By Michael Lafferty

GameZone selects
the 2009 Video-game Vixen of the Year

We all know that good girls seem to have a thing for ‘bad boys’ or at least the
attitude or image of a ‘bad boy.’ It seems that works the other way around as
well, though.

Quick – Lindsey Lohan or Hillary Duff? ‘Bad’ girl or ‘girl next door?’ If you
picked Hillary, you can stop reading now.

On Thursday, GameZone ran a feature naming the
Video-game Hunk of the Year. Fair
is fair and it’s time to name the Video-game Babe of the Year. Informal ballots
went out to the GameZone writers and the results are in. We will dispense of
that first runner-up nonsense, simply because we don’t want gunplay involved and
the rankings to change in the drifting smoke of a darkened room that reeks of
used gunpowder.

Suffice it to say that the ladies about to be announced are not to be trifled


Ophelia – Brutal

So drown your
tears in me my dear
As you drown, my dear, in me.

Driven to a slightly psychotic state as a dark crazed druidic Tear Drinker,
Ophelia was the character so overcome by grief that she was to drown herself in
the Sea of Black Tears. Before she could change her mind, a dark force drags her
in, drowns her and the Dark Ophelia emerges. In some ways, Ophelia walked the
line of duality, the good girl who strikes out independently, deeply in love
with the story’s hero, but is burned by mistrust and suspicion, has her heart
broken and drifts away, only to emerge, seemingly, as a twisted and dark
creature driven by rage and hatred. She is a companion of the heart and a
nightmare locked in your mind. … You know, like ex-girlfriends.

Lillith –

“Any woman as good looking as me can do what I do,” says Lilith, and what she
does is kill – whatever gets in the way of what she wants or what she is
assigned to do. One of the so-called Sirens of the quirky shooter Borderlands,
Lilith is an assassin. She has been touched by alien technology, which gives her
the power base she draws from to indiscriminately cause massive chaos.

GameZone took Lilith to lunch to discuss the nomination. She ordered steak and
when asked how she would like it prepared, she locked eyes with the GZ writer
and said: “Bloody, like my men.”

“Uh, waiter … I’ll like to order some spine, please.”
“And how would you like that, sir?”

queue the ominous music …

Ok, we’ve dispensed with the runners-up, not literally, so now on to the main

And the winner is …

Morrigan – Dragon
Age: Origins

Emerging out of the swamps of Ferelden, Morrigan is a mage of enormous
potential. Armed with a sensuous, accent-tinged voice, this is a woman who could
utter a few well-chosen words and with the hint of promise in her dark eyes, she
could make most men run at high dragons unarmed and wearing nothing but a smile
… and win the fight. Her sarcasm is a tease, though. She might very well reward
her champion by tapping his life-force to power up a spell. But even when the
life was seeping from him, the object of her manipulations would smile
idiotically and murmur “she likes me! She really likes me!!” DA:O was a game in
which many male players took pains to woo Morrigan and more than a few
proclaimed, proudly, that they got a kiss from this cyber-siren. Alluring? Yep.
Take her home to meet mom? No way. That would probably end badly … something
involving fireballs, the smell of magic wafting through the air and someone
reduced to smoldering pile of ashes.

When informed of her award, in typical Morrigan fashion, she merely commented:
“How pleasant for you; how droll for me.”