originals\ Nov 19, 2011 at 9:00 am

Ten Obscure Characters That Should Have Been in Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3


As evidenced by my latest article, which was essentially just me yelling ‘I LOVE BATMAN’ for an entire article, I’m a pretty big comic book nerd.  So, as you can imagine, the release of Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 has me pretty excited. I’m especially pumped for Rocket Raccoon, much to the bewilderment of my friends. (“No, guys, he’s awesome!  He’s a raccoon in space!  And his best friend is a tree!”) However, I think the developers of UMvC3 could have gone even more obscure.  Marvel has a massive well of characters, and they can’t all be winners.  Here are ten obscure Marvel characters that I think should have made the cut.  Maybe.

Jack O’Lantern

First of all, yes, Jack O’Lantern has a pumpkin for a head.  Sometimes it’s referenced as just being a helmet, and sometimes people act like it’s an actual head.  Nobody knows.  Either way, Jack O’lantern’s got a glider, some bombs, and, uh.... Well, I guess they could put in someone like Green Goblin instead.  Jack O’Lantern is pretty lame.

Batroc the Leaper

Oh, man!  Here comes Batroc the Leaper!  Everybody look the f*ck out, he’s gonna.... leap?  Batroc is the least threatening guy ever.  And yet, somehow, this dude has gone toe to toe with guys like Spider-Man and Captain America, and he’s still running around, leaping.  That’s persistence, yo.  Also, just think of all the cool, uh, leaping moves he could have. 


Despite basically being a direct ripoff of DC’s Swamp Thing, Man Thing is awesome.  He’s the guardian of the Nexus of Realities (which is exactly what it sounds like), he can teleport whenever he wants, and anyone who’s afraid of him burns at his touch.  He’d be a super fun take on the Heavy Hitter type of character, and he’d be able to summon the power of the Nexus.  The only downside is all the d*ck jokes that your friends are gonna make about his name.

Amadeus Cho

Amadeus Cho is an Asian kid whose superpower is math.  Let that sink in for a bit.  He also rides around on a scooter and has a pet baby wolf.  I guess that’s a little cooler.  But still, why should this guy be-

Because his best friend is this dude:


That’s why.

Amadeus Cho is awesome.  Even though his superpower is math, which everyone knows is lame.

Lockjaw (dog)

Lockjaw is a teleporting dog who might also have some sort of lighting powers.  I don’t really know, and I’d be too depressed about googling it.  But either way, just look at this guy.  I know that UMvC3 is already gonna have a dog (and a raccoon, for that matter), but this guy looks like he could tear Amaterasu a new one.  With lighting, maybe.

Glob Herman

Glob Herman’s ‘power,’ if you can call it that, is that he’s a skeleton encased in living wax.  That doesn’t sound very cool, except that he has a penchant for lighting the wax on fire and throwing it at people.  Also, his level 3 Ultra would probably be, like, way gross.  But, like, in a cool way.


Stilt-Man is something of a running joke in the Marvel Universe.  His power is lame, his name is lame, and let’s be honest, he’s pretty lame overall.  However, think of the possibilities for this guy in a fighting game.  I’m picturing Stilt-Man himself as being entirely offscreen, with only his legs protruding in from the top.  Gadgets would come out of his legs and fight you, and you’d have to jump to even see the rest of him.  I’m not sure that this would actually be as cool as I think it would, but at the very least, it would be hilarious.

Nico Minoru

Nico Minoru, or Sister Grimm AS SHE WAS BRIEFLY CALLED (I accidentally hit the caps lock key, but I’m gonna leave it that way ‘cause I think it’s hilarious) has what might be the coolest power ever.  She can do LITERALLY ANYTHING (that time it was on purpose), but she can only do it one time.  Once she’s done something, she can never do it again.  Just think of how cool this would be in Ultimate.  You’d do an input, and there’d be some huge number of possible moves it might do.  She’d be almost impossible to play with, but magic is awesome.

The Spot

First of all, I just want you to take that picture in for a bit.  Just really absorb what’s happening there, ‘cause it’s glorious.  Done?  Alright, cool.  The Spot is a super C-list villain who has a reputation for being pretty lame, but actually has kind of a neat power.  In a fighting game, it would be way fun to drop portals everywhere to confuse your enemies.  You could also use your portals to send their own projectiles back at them.  He’d be super annoying to fight, but super satisfying to use.

Foggy Nelson

There are only two things you need to know about Foggy Nelson:  He’s Daredevil’s best friend, and he’s a lawyer.

No, really, that’s it.  If Phoenix Wright can be in this game, then so can Foggy.  Shut up.

About The Author
Eric Zipper Eric Zipper is a writer and comedian living in Los Angeles. When he's not making you laugh, playing video games, or watching movies, he's probably sleeping. Follow him on Twitter @erzip
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