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Originals

Originals

3 movies we want to see remade, and 3 movies we never want to see

[Continued] Page 2

3 movies that we never want to see

Space Jam with Lebron James

space jam lebron james

It's not because I'm hating on Lebron — even though he goes by King James before ever winning a Title. It's because he's no Michael Jordan. No one is. And that's why this can never ever happen. And I know some movie producer or executive somewhere is just dying to do this. They've probably seen the commercials with Lebron and thought he was funny. Then he realizes that bright shirts of Sesame Street characters' faces are really popular amongst inner-city youth. Then he couldn't tell the difference between Loony Tunes and Sesame Street.

I know you guys could see this being made, and that's why we have to ax it right now. No Space Jam with Lebron James. No Space Jam with anyone. While we're at it — no Kazaam either.

 

Batman after Christopher Nolan leaves

george clooney batman

First there were the Tim Burton/Michael Keaton Batman movies; those were good. Now we have the Christopher Nolan/Christian Bale Batman movies. In between there was... darkness. It was the dark ages of the Batman movies. It was campy bullsh*t with big-name actors in roles they had no business being in. We had Val Kilmer and George Clooney in pointy-nippled Batman suits. We had Arnold Schwarzenegger playing Mr. Freeze and all of these awful puns:

  • What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!
  • Stay cool, Bird-boy.
  • All right everyone, Chill!
  • Cool party.
  • Allow me to break the ice. My name is Freeze. Learn it well, for it's the chilling sound of your doom!
  • Let's kick some ICE!

I'll stop there. There's also the really bad intros of Batgirl and Robin. Nothing is good about those movies. And now we're priming for a reboot. It has to be done; Nolan's Batman is done and has no place in the Justice League movie coming up. Batman can't fit in the way he currently is. A new Batman is on its way, and while it doesn't mean it's going cheese-ball again, I'm not looking forward to what might come.

 

Ghostbusters without Bill Murray

bill murray ghostbusters III

Dan Akroyd, Harold Ramis... listen. Do not make a third Ghostbusters movie if Bill Murray isn't going to do it. No one wants to see that, because it just won't work. Apparently you've sent him a few drafts and scripts, and none of them have been good. Why? Because Dan and Harold aren't writing the script. They have the lesser names that penned Year One writing it... because that movie was sooooo good.

When you hear Bill Murray talk about Ghostbusters III, he sounds so torn. You can tell he's great friends with Dan and Harold, and he sounds like he's really like to do another, but the script just isn't there. He didn't love the script for Ghostbusters II, so there's no way he's going to do a third if it isn't up to stuff.

So here's the simple solution: write an awesome script. Dan Akroyd and Harold Ramis needs to sit down and really hammer out a great idea. The rest of the original cast is already in. Just focus on the writing. It needs that subtle adult humor that the first one had. No matter what script you have, fans will not enjoy it if Bill Murray isn't in it... so fix it. I like the rumors of Seth Rogen and Paul Rudd, and I would like Seth helping with the script, but like I said, no one wants to see a Bill Murray-less Ghostbusters.

…. So be good, for goodness sake. Whoa-oh somebody's comin!

You can follow Lance Liebl on Twitter @Lance_GZ. He also like t-shirts... send him t-shirts. KCCO.

Tags: Movies, Bill Murray, Ghostbusters III, Super Mario Bros., Street Fighter

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